I’ve had quite a few conversations this week, friends reaching out and even people I haven’t spoken to in a long time, that made me realize that I needed to share another story to answer one question: Why did I say no?
In 2007 I started working for a company called Causeforce. It was an amazing opportunity that allowed me to not only get paid, but to actually make a huge impact on people’s lives. We produced fundraising events that raised millions of dollars for the Segal Cancer Center at Jewish General Hospital in Montreal. I had just lost a dear friend to breast cancer (love you Rita!) and sold my tanning salon, so the job couldn’t have come at a better time, funny how the universe has your back. My first day, was attending a summit in LA. I was so excited and I fell in love with the city. Throughout the years of working at CF, I always made my intention clear .. if there were any openings in LA I’m in! but because I didn’t have a bachelors degree, they couldn’t sponsor me on an H1B visa. oh well..
I started as a Team Lead, then moved on to Logistics Manager, then to Operations Manager in a couple of years. I loved every minute of it. I had a management position without any experience, I was the only one meeting the numbers across the country and the head office was in LA so I never had anyone watching over me. I got comfortable really fast, it was a perfect scenario.
Isn’t it funny how one moment can completely shake up your whole world? For me it was a phone call I received from the COO in September 2011, it was a Wednesday. This is how the conversation went: ” As you know the company is growing and we just signed 3 new cities in Australia.” …. ” how do you feel about moving there and being the National Sales Manager?” …
I have never been to Australia, never thought of visiting Australia. My immediate answer was “No!, are you crazy? I can’t move to Australia!” and that was that. We got off the phone and I continued my day.
Throughout the week, I kept on thinking about it.. I mentioned it to my friends and my family and of course everyone had the same reaction as I did. So I called the one person in my life that didn’t have a daily attachment to me. We had been friends for a number of years, but he lived in Atlanta and had a busy life so we spoke randomly just to check in. I needed that biased/logical conversation and thats exactly what I got. He asked me one question: What made you say no? of course I came up with a bunch of reasons: How can I live in a country I’ve never been to before? How can I just move my family and friends are all here ? How can I move when my father was sick and in the hospital? how can I leave my mom? How can I leave the guy I was with for the last 10 years? What if I don’t like it? and on and on and on .. He listened to me rant and then asked me again: What really made you say no? and then told me to think about it and he got off the phone.
Well here is the answer: FEAR.. I was scared of the unknown, I was scared of being uncomfortable , I was scared of change. Aljamaal, my genius friend, thank you for that moment. If it wasn’t for you I would be doing exactly the same thing I was doing 4 years ago. I would have never experienced so many wonderful things if you hadn’t pushed me to stop making excuses.
Monday morning I called and accepted the offer. Just 2 weeks later, the day after my 34th birthday, I packed up 3 suitcases, put all my stuff in storage, said good bye to my Dad and hopped on a 24 hour flight to Sydney.
I knew 4 months in that I was not going to live there forever, but it was an incredible year. I learned a lot about myself and what I was capable of. I managed 4 cities, travelled all over the country, lived on the beach and raised over 20 million dollars that year for cancer research. None of that matters as much as the friendships I gained: Alex, Meredith, Will, Ory, Lizzy, Sarah, Patricia. How lucky am I to have people on the other side of the world I can call family.
Guess where I live now? Sometimes the universe makes you take a detour before giving you what you want, but I finally made it to LA LA Land. I did work my ass off, made a lot of sacrifices, missed a lot of moments (My Dad died when I was living in Australia) but now I am living exactly where/how I want to, green card and all.
In 2015.. I got another phone call that resembled the one I received 4 years ago.. Fear took over again, how can I leave my cushy Managing Director job and take a 50% pay cut? But I did.. 8 years with the same company and I woke up one morning and gave them my 2 weeks notice (Alex, Meredith, Dylan, thanks for listening to my shit and thank you for the support through the process). I was terrified and had anxiety, but I knew this was another “Australia moment”. I went from a stagnant 9-5 to a world I only saw on TV. It has opened up my mind to a whole new reality and I am loving every moment of it.
So my friends, fear is your worst enemy. Fear is the only reason why you say “no” or “I can’t” or make up excuses. Let me ask you this.. What’s the worst thing that can happen to any of us in life? The only answer is death.. if you won’t die from taking a risk then fucking take it. There is a reason why it has been presented to you. Why would you not take a chance and see what happens? Why stay doing what you are doing and then complain about it? Why keep doing the same thing day in and day out and expect different results? If you keep playing the same notes, you are always going to end up with the same song.
Life is full of amazing opportunities, YOU are the only one standing in your way so the next time you say “no” to something , the only question you should ask is ” Am i going to die if I say yes?” Probably not.. so fuck it and jump into the unknown, don’t be surprised when you land and end up in your own LA LA land
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